For this issue, the diversity column is highlighting the neurodivergent community at WFS. To get a sampling of perspectives on this topic, here are some questions from our community and answers with Esther Adebi ‘24 and Oliver and Eli Stanko ‘24 who clerk the club, FIND (Friends Identifying as Neurodivergent).
What’s a typical process of getting diagnosed?
Oliver: “Usually the “rst step is to talk to your general practitioner or psychiatrist if you already have on.” Esther: “It varies from like, neuro- type to neurotype.” “A#er research- ing, you know, like, the disorder itself that you feel like you identify with, it would be like a matter of “nding the best place that’s like the most unbi- ased to get diagnosed. Stella helped me with that.” (Note: Money, biases, and how ob- vious your behaviors are can impact your ability to get a diagnosis, but people like Stella are helpful resourc- es because sometimes you need a formal diagnosis to get accommodations.) .
Can people self-diagnose as neurodivergent?
Eli: “Self-diagnosis is an absolutely valid thing to do. !ere are lots of reasons someone couldn’t get or wouldn’t want to get a diagnosis formally.” “You can sometimes “nd online the formal tests that people would take at the doctor. You can see if your traits align with the formal diagnosis.” “It doesn’t necessarily need to be a checklist like “Do I “t all these traits and symp- toms?” It’s not like putting yourself in one box that you’ll forever be in. It’s just trying to “nd the label that you think “ts you best in this moment that can help get you the support that you need.”
What role do you think stereotypes about neurodivergent people play in society and individuals’ relation- ships with themselves?
Oliver: “I think internalized ableism is a huge component that stops people from even thinking about whether they might have any sort of neurodivergence.” “People think of the sort of symptoms that medically would be recognized as neurodiver- gence as normal or a $aw that needs to be “xed.” Esther: ”Neurodivergent stereotypes are always like, portrayed in some form of extreme a lot of the time. Like, they’re never looked at as just like a thing that’s an aspect of a per- son. Because of that, it erases a lot of depictions of neurodivergent people and the nuance of their situations. And in a way that makes it almost harder to explain to other people.”
Can you give me just an example or two or something a neurodivergent person might struggle with that wouldn’t be obviously apparent to most people?
Eli: “A lot of neurodivergent people struggle with task initiation, with starting things that maybe they really want to but struggle to get themselves to start doing it. It can be starting a TV show, homework, anything really.” Oliver: “You only see represented extreme examples of sensory issues. A lot of the time it’s not outwardly obvious so people don’t recognize that something is a sensitivity. !ey think they’re just being dramatic.”
What part of being neurodivergent do you think is the hardest for your neurotypical friends to understand?
Oliver: “My needs can vary day to day, but also just the way that I inter- act with people. And so communica- tion might be hard one day, or easy the next. And so I think, even, you know, best friends, it throws people o% a lot of the time to be to think that, you know, you’re getting used to seeing a person one way or thinking of them, that they might perceive the world one way and then sud- denly you feel like you’re completely thrown o%.” Eli: “Helping them avoid like a trig- ger that you might have recognized is really helpful a lot of the time.””Be- ing receptive to if people say, ‘!e way you chew is bothers me.’ Just understanding that might bother one person and just roll with it.” Esther: “If you’re not sure about something regarding their experi- ence just ask them. You can ask more general questions like, “What can I do to be supportive for you?” because it’s di%erent for each person.” “Seeing your neurodivergent friend in a state of crisis can be really alarming if you don’t know what to do because you haven’t talked about it before. “Make a game plan for you and your friend in the future that, so you can be the person who knows what to do to help in that situation.”
Are there words people should stray away from?
Oliver: “Don’t say stu% like the r-slur and ‘I’m so OCD’ or ‘you’re autistic’ as an in- sult.” “I don’t think disorder and disability should be strayed away from as a per- sonal opinion.” But person- ally, I think that a huge part of neurodivergence is that it hinders your access to things Esther: “!e R-slur is really never acceptable.” “!ings like ‘specially-abled’ or ‘di%erently-abled’, I under- stand the point of it, but sometimes things just do have a net-negative impact, but it doesn’t make you any less of a person if your brain works against you some- times.” “High-functioning and low-functioning are not accurate terms. It [your needs] varies from day to day time to time.”
What’s it part of being neurodiver- gent that you think is beautiful or interesting?
Esther: “A lot of the neurodivergent people in my life are just extreme- ly passionate about what they’re interested in.” Oliver: “It’s usually not highlighted the fun parts of neuro- divergence like special interests or experiencing the world in a di%erent way. You might have people with synesthesia who listen to music and see colors. For a lot of neurodiver- gent people, music is something they experience totally di%erently.” “!en, I think when neurodiverse people are able to connect with each other, it’s such a like, genuine positive connection because there’s no having to mask or present with your words di%erently than how you feel just to appeal to the neurotypical standard.”
